Rambo: The Video Game – PC Game Review

I am honestly not even sure where to begin. I love the Rambo movies! I even watched the 2008 “Rambo” movie to completion. Hell, I even watched the Animated series(Though, to be fair I was a wee child at the time, and wasn’t too picky with my cartoons). I also love video games! So, basically “Rambo: The Video Game” was basically like someone coming along and bumping into me, and knocking my chocolate bar into their peanut butter jar! It’s 2 great tastes, that go great together!

Now, this is by no means the first Rambo video game! There have been several video games based on the franchise that have released on various platforms. They’ve been released on everything from the Commodore 64 to the mobile platform. This however, as far as I know is the first time a Rambo game was released on PC(As well as Xbox 360 and PS3…Though this review is for the PC version, and I am not sure how similar it is to the console versions).

The game is a little old! It came out in early 2014, and like I said earlier, was released on PS3 and Xbox 360. Some of you maybe wondering why I took so long to play the game, if I love games and Rambo so much. The answer to that is “Time”! As much as I love games, I still have other things to do in my life. Which means that a good number of games slip past my radar, or just get put on the back burner until I can find the time to play it! R:TVG is one such game that found it’s self on the back burner.

The idea of a Rambo game is fairly exciting! It has a lot of potential, a large ready-made fan base and tons of game styles to choose from! Basically, when it comes to making a Rambo Video Game, it’s almost impossible to make a stinker! That is unless you are the game developer Teyon! Somehow, they managed to create a mess of a game, based on a good franchise. Then, somehow managed to shovel it all up and convince Reef Entertainment to actually publish the thing!

You might recognize the name of the Developer! Teyon has developed a few other games in the past(The heavy Fire games, as well as a several lesser known titles)..The publisher hasn’t published anything else other than this game, though they do state that they have a Terminator game coming out! Of course, that was first announced in 2013, and they have revealed no information about it! No screenshots, concept art or even who the developer is going to be. So, there’s a chance it won’t see the light of day! Maybe Rambo ruined it for them?! Who knows!

Back to the game at hand! Rambo: The Video game(Which I am just going to refer to as Rambo from here on out) is an on rails shooter, much like the developers other more well-known franchise “Heavy Fire”. It begins at the funeral of John J. Rambo! The story is told mostly as flashbacks during Rambos eulogy. Starting with Rambos escape from a Vietnam POW camp, through the events of Rambo 3, and though there are some differences between the game and the movies it’s basically the story you all know and are familiar with(Assuming you have watched the Rambo movies of course).

The graphics aren’t bad in the game! Don’t get me wrong, they aren’t great either! Although, the model they used for Rambo? That is pretty bad! In fact, it’s one of the worst likenesses of Sylvester Stallone that I have ever seen! If I were Stallone, I would sue!

As I mentioned before, the game is an on rails shooter! Which basically means that you have no control of the character. You just move the crosshairs around the screen and shoot the enemies popping out at you. Once you blast away your enemies on the screen, the main character will automatically turn around, or move forward and a new batch of enemies will pop out so you can gun them down. However, Unlike a lot of On rail shooters, Rambo does give you some “Partial Control” over the movement of John Rambo. At least in the sense that you can sometimes take cover behind something. It’s not much, but it’s something!

I’m going to be blunt here! On rails shooters belong in the arcade! At the very least played with a light gun, or a wiimote! Something like that! Playing the game with a gamepad or even a mouse cursor just sucks! I have always believed that certain types of games are better off on certain platforms. MMORPGS are better off on PC, platforming games are better off on Consoles and On rails shooters are better off in arcades.

So, it goes without saying that the games controls are annoying! Both the gamepad and mouse controls just stink! To be fair, that can’t be avoided because of the type of game it is…but why make that type of game when you know it’s going to stink for anyone not using a light zapper, or at the very least a wiimote?

Thankfully though, the whole game isn’t just shooting. There are a few On Rail “Stealth” moments and On Rails Melee moments, but those are basically just QTE cut scenes. They allow less interaction than the shooter aspect! Plus, a good many people hate QTE in games(I myself love them, but I am just weird).

Then to make matters worse, the developer apparently felt that you don’t need to manually save! All saving is done automatically through a checkpoint system. Now, checkpoint saves are pretty common these days, but allowing manual save or quick saves is always nice! Though, to be fair it isn’t really needed since the game isn’t that difficult! Enemies pop out in the same locations at the same time, so if you fail and get killed enough times, you will eventually memorize the pattern and blow them away easily enough. It might be more of a challenge if the placements of enemies were more random?

The sound in the game is equally bad! Rambo and Troutman are basically audio clips taken right from the movies, and at times they are can be hard to hear, and rarely seem to fit with the other voice “Actors” (And I use the term loosely since this is some terrible voice acting work. It’s almost laughable really) in the game. It’s horrible, and honestly if they couldn’t afford Stallone to come in and do some voice work…hire someone who does impressions! What you did here is just shoddy work man!

To be honest? There’s nothing redeeming about this game, aside from the fact that it’s Rambo! Should you buy it? I wouldn’t recommend it! Not even to a hard-core Rambo fan! The game costs 25 backaroos on steam which is about 22 dollars more than it’s worth! If you catch it on sale, and it’s only about 3 or so bucks? By all means grab it! Otherwise don’t bother, because the game is just bad!

If however you absolutely MUST experience the “action packed journey” that is RAMBO: The Video Game, just watch a YouTube walk through! The person playing it in the videos experience will be identical to your experience since it’s an on Rails shooter…the only difference is you will still have 25 bucks in your pocket, and can munch popcorn while laughing about how you dodged a bullet by not buying the game.

PROS

• It’s Rambo
• Variety of locations.
• Different “Game modes”
• QTEs(Unless you hate them)

CONS

• Poor modeling
• Bad Voice Acting.
• Poorly ripped Soundtrack audio from films.
• Bad controls
• No Manual Save
• QTEs(Unless you love them)

Overall score: 1.5/10

Ghostbuster Reboot Trailer

Well, the trailer for the new Ghostbusters Reboot trailer has arrived today! If I am being honest here, I am not overly thrilled with it. I had planned on seeing it before watching the trailer, but not after watching the trailer. Feel free to take a look yourself.

The movie just doesn’t seem to have the same charm as the original Ghostbusters. It looks like it relies mostly on crude jokes, instead of good writing. Though to be fair, I could be way off! It’s hard to judge a movie by it’s trailer. There’s a chance that the film could be awesome! However, I am not holding my breath for that. I would be happy if it’s just watchable.

One thing I do have an issue with though is, why are the three scientists white and the one black woman has to be a street wise tough gal. It’s kind of like in the original Ghostbuster movies, Winston was the only non-scientist and was the only black man in the group. What is it with Ghostbusters? Do they feel African Americans can’t be scientists? It’s kind of stupid for a movie that’s trying so desperately to be politically correct by flipping the gender card, that they would stick to the same “Only white people can be scientists” formula.

Whatever…I’ll probably still watch it, but I’m not longer looking forward to it any longer.

Anyone else have an opinion on it? Good or bad? Would love to hear your thoughts.

 

Star Wars: The Force Awakens Trailer

Everybody who knows me, knows that I am a geek. Especially when it comes to 5 major Sci-Fi franchises. Those Being Star Trek, Firefly, Doctor Who, Babylon 5 and Star wars(I don’t consider Marvel/DC movies Sci-Fi, even though many of them fall into that category. Super Hero flicks I consider more Adventure than Sci-Fi). So, I have been very anxious for the release of the new Star Wars move “The Force Awakens”. Unfortunately, that won’t be until December, However they DID release a trailer. Obviously I was breathless with anticipation!

If you have been living under a rock or a bridge with a secret troll lover, then you have heard about it, and already watched it. However, I will put it below so that the Troll lovers out there can catch up with what the rest of the world is experiencing.

Watched? Good! Now, most people I know thought it was awesome. One in particular cried because seeing Han Solo brought her so much joy. Yeah, I’m not the biggest geek in my circle of friends. Surprised? You can be surprised about me either not being the biggest geek in my social circle, or about me having friends in general. Both are acceptable surprising factoids.

Anyway! My point was that I didn’t love the trailer. In fact, I was somewhat disappointed? The whole Melted Vader helmet thing? Seemed stupid, and like it was some kind of forced lip service to fans of the franchise. It just didn’t feel natural. Then there is Darth Wannabe! I hate his voice! He doesn’t sound bad ass at all! Not like Vader did!

In fact, the trailer didn’t reach out and grab me at all, which is insane because it’s Star Wars. It seemed even MORE boring than the prequel trilogy. The only good thing I saw in this trailer was a lack of lens flares! I was honestly expecting the movie to be unwatchable due to lens flares!

It’s like Abrams is going out of his way to direct and ruin all the Sci-Fi movies that are based on franchises that I hold dear. Please keep him away from Doctor Who! I don’t want that ruined for me any more than it already has been.

Lastly, there’s the poster!

Missing Luke Skywalker! Now, for me I am fine with this. His trilogy was the original trilogy. I don’t believe it’s his story, but on that same note I don’t think it’s Hans or Leias story either. However, THEY made it to the poster! So, while I don’t have as big an issue with this omittance as much as others in the geek circle do, it’s still a tad frustrating that they give two other supporting characters a poster place, but not another. His name is printed on the poster, between Harrison Ford and Carrie Fisher, so It’s obvious that he is going to be in it. Either put him on the poster, or Remove Han and Leia!

Anyway! I will probably still see it, but I won’t be one of those people dressed as Ewoks(Not that it’s ALWAYS a bad thing) and camping in line for tickets…though you don’t really need to do that now anymore I guess huh? You can just order them online these days! If I see it, most likely I won’t even bother going to the movies. Might wait for DVD….Might even just wait for it to come out on Netflix. I’m just not that into it anymore. I would rather have the expanded Universe back. At least THAT was enjoyable. Instead they made that non-canon and gave us this. Not a good trade for Star Wars geeks.

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Vanishing Act

The Last of Us – Joel grappling (Photo credit: naughty_dog)

Good lord! I haven’t posted on here since March 26th? It doesn’t seem like it! The reason why is a crapload of new games ended up getting released, and by jove I had to play them! Some were insanely incredible, and others were giant disappointments. Still, they needed to be played.

After I had gotten caught up on the heat from the oncoming Summer blasted over the land, causing me to enter a lethargic state! All I wanted / want  to do is sleep! That’s what heat does to me! I am not sure if everyone gets tired when the temp begins to rise, but I certainly do!

So, when I haven’t been sweating, I have been snoozing. Either way, it’s not a good time to blog! I would say that I plan on blogging more, and I will! However, just not for a few days, because tomorrow is the release date of “The Last of Us“!

Mockbusters

Unless you have been hiding under a rock for a while, then you have no doubt heard of the “Mockbuster” and in case you have in fact been using a hallowed out chunk of granite as your abode, allow me to explain.

The “Mockbuster” is basically a B-grade movie that cashes in, by riding the coat-tails of bigger blockbusters! These Mockbusters, often “Borrow” plot elements and a similar name to their source material.  So, in essence, they just rip off good movies, and try to trick you into watching it, by making you think you are about to watch the “Good one”, only to find that instead of watching transformers, yer watching freedom fighters hiding under a bridge battling badly rendered robots(So badly rendered that one could be forgiven if they thought these models were originally ran on a PSOne game console) that turn into, pretty much anything imaginable.

Ok, now that Mockbusters are explained, I want to state that normally I don’t have an issue with Mockbusters. In fact, I find most of them to be quite enjoyable, but in all fairness, I am a huge fan of B-rated movies, and consider Plan 9 From Outer Space to be one of the best movies ever created! Though, a few Mockbuster titles do come close to beating it for the number one position.

Let’s be honest here folks, most people aren’t going to be fooled by a Mockbuster title. If you can’t tell the difference between AVH: Aliens Vs Hunter, and AVP: Aliens Vs Predator, then you probably shouldn’t be watching the real one, since those iconic characters apparently don’t mean shit to you. Same applies to Transmorphers and Transformers.

Now, I’m not saying that anyone who gets suckered by a Mockbuster is a dumb shit. In fact, some Mockbusters are titled quite sneakily! For instance The Terminators and Universal Soldiers. One would be forgiven for mistaking them for their source material. The names are quite similar, so it’s a given that probably more than one person has fallen victim to this particular switch and bait.

I am also not saying that I am so perfect, that I haven’t been tricked into watching one, because I have! Now, While I enjoy Mockbusters and B-Rated movies, I don’t enjoy them so much when I am sitting down, expecting one thing, and instead getting something completely different, which has happened to me exactly twice.

The first time, I waltzed into Blockbuster video and picked up H.G. Wells: War of the Worlds, when what I meant to get was the Tom Cruise movie “War of the Worlds”. However, I ended up with a C. Thomas Howell rip-off version, which oddly enough turned out to be better than the Tom Cruise version. If you haven’t seen it, I totally recommend it.

By the way, I firmly believe that C. Thomas Howell has been in more Mockbusters than any other actor. I could be wrong, but I don’t think so.

As I mentioned before, I have been suckered by a Mockbuster twice, the second and most recent time, and by recent I mean this afternoon, I went out to get my Mail, and saw Netflix had delivered my newest batch of must see movies. I popped them open, and found myself holding a Mockbuster! Apparently, instead of adding BATTLE: Los Angeles to my queue, I ended up adding Battle for Los Angeles!

Obviously, I hopped onto the computer, logged into Netflix and quickly added the right movie to my queue.

So, yeah, anyway, remember to double-check what movies you rent or you might get suckered.

I Miss the Drive-in

Image via Wikipedia

Why are theaters so damn popular? I miss Drive-ins! I keep hoping that one day, it will turn out that Theaters were nothing more than a passing fad, and Drive-ins will take its rightful place as the place to go and watch movies.

Let’s face it, Drive-ins are much cooler than theaters. What does a theater have going for it? Ok, the A/C is nice, I will give you that. Other than that though? Not a damn thing! Sure, you can go see movies even during the day, but seriously, what’s the point of seeing a movie during the day? Night-time is the time to watch things for entertainment value. I don’t care if its Plays, Television shows or movies!

Ok, you got me, Soap Operas are best watched during the day. I’ll give you that, but unless they are planning on releasing “General Hospital: The Motion Picture”, it doesn’t really matter!

You can go to the Drive-in wearing your pajamas and slippers, you can sit in the comfort of your own car and watch the movie, or plop out a mattress in the back of a truck and watch it laying down. Plus, since women folk always like to talk during movies, you have the option of talking about the movie in the privacy of your own car, without disturbing others who might be trying to enjoy the film.

I know, there’s only a handful of drive-ins still in existence, but that doesn’t mean they aren’t any good. I don’t really know what it means to be honest, but I think people should wake up, and demand that Drive-ins make a come back!

I will state this; if Drive-ins were still around, I would go to see movies on the big screen again. As it is, I just wait for the flick to get released on DVD. That way, I can still watch it in my PJs, laying down, and people can still come over and talk about the movie while I am trying to enjoy it.

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Watching Batman Begins

Cover of Batman Begins (Widescreen Edition)

 

You’ve all no doubt heard of the movie Batman Begins, which starred Christian Bale, Liam Neeson, Morgan Freeman, Michael Caine, Katie Holmes, Gary Oldman, Rutger Hauer and probably more. I mean, the movie is packed with more celebrities than a Beverly Hills Rehab center. You’ve heard of it right? I’m pretty sure most everyone who is alive and breathing has at least heard of it. You might be like me, and had never watched it, but you’ve heard of it. If you haven’t, you should come out from underneath your rock more often, the sun will do you good!

Anyway, the other night, I finally decided to sit down, and actually watch the movie. Why did I decide to watch it you ask? Various reasons, but one reason was because people kept telling me how great it was, and how it’s the best Batman movie ever created. Combining that, with my recent enjoyment of the game Batman: Arkham Asylum, I figured I would give it a shot.

So, I sat down and watched it. The special effects were good, and most of the acting wasn’t bad. For the most part, I was impressed. What I wasn’t too thrilled with was Christian Bale. I am sorry, but he made a horrible batman! I know, I am probably shooting myself in the foot with this entry, because I am well aware that the vast majority of the population thinks he’s the best batman ever.

Don’t get me wrong, he is a capable actor, and his “Bruce Wayne” is good, but his Batman is horrible! Especially his Batman voice. What’s up with that? He sounds more like Billy Bob Thornton in Sling Blade, than he did Batman.

Other than that, the movie was good. I wouldn’t say it was the best Batman movie. I think it’s sequel Dark Knight was better, and even better still was the original Batman movie with Michael Keaton and Jack Nicholson.

It’s Not just for computers anymore

Cover via Amazon

Are you familiar with the term ReBoot in terms of film franchises? Some people might not be, so a quick explanation and examples will be given. A reboot, is when a film franchise either grows stale, or just runs out of material, or just received bad reviews. The idea is, if instead of doing a sequel, they just start over again, and hope they can re-write everything from scratch. They can use old characters that might not be alive in the previous version. Personally, I am not a fan of film reboots, but whatever!

Some examples of ReBoots in films:
 
Batman was Rebooted and called Batman Begins.
The Karate Kid was Rebooted and called The Karate Kid,
HULK was Rebooted and called The incredible Hulk.
James Bond got a reboot called Casino Royale
Classic horror films like Halloween, Friday the 13th and A Nightmare on Elm St. all got rebooted.

The point of this post? The point is, there’s two upcoming Reboots, that I am really not Excited about. I think one has been rebooted ENOUGH and the other, I think should continue along the same path it has been, and if need be, just recast. Films Recast different actors in their role all the time. How many batmen were there before the reboot? like, 4 or so? How many James bonds before the reboot? Can’t even begin counting!

The first film is “The Punisher“, and this ticks me off because it’s already been rebooted. Not once, but twice! Is three times really necessary? I don’t think it is. Either continue along a path, or just give up on the punisher flicks all together.

The second film is Spider-Man. Sure, it had a good run! Three kick ass films, and I was looking forward to a fourth, but that’s now Not going to happen. The films getting a reboot, so will be starting from scratch with a new actor, who has never had the experiences as the peter parker from the previous three films. Yea, I know it gets complicated.

So, yea. Basically I am not a huge fan of Reboots.

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Some things should stay in the 80’s

Cover of Bill & Ted's Excellent Adventure

 

 Back in the 80’s they released a movie about teenage time travelers. No, I am not talking about back to the future! I am referring to Bill & Teds Excellent Adventure, which starred Keanu Reeves in one of his earlier roles. Unlike the DeLorean from back to the future, Bill & Ted used a phone booth, kinda like the TARDIS but nowhere near as cool looking, and definitely not as roomy.

The movie centered around 2 highschool losers, who needed to pass a history test so they could perform at a music event. To ensure this happened, a Time traveler came back in his phone booth, and took the kids out on a journey through time. All so they could pass their history test. The premise sounds extremely stupid, I agree. However, the movie developed quite a large cult following, and even spawned a sequel, as well as a comic book series, An animated series, as well as a short-lived television series despite the films sheer stupidity.

That was then, and thankfully the world moved on. Bill & Ted is perhaps the worst film franchise in the history of bad film franchises. It basically, is a film better left to rot in the past. Forgotten for all eternity. Will that happen though? Hell no! Apparently, they are in development of Bill & Ted 3. Seriously, a third film after this long? It’s not even a reboot, it’s part three! They actually want to continue the so-called story, and not just recreate it to make it less lame.

Gaming and TV watchin’?

I discovered a pretty damn keen program today called “PlayOn“! It’s easy to install, for the most part, and it will connect to your Xbox 360(or PS3 or Wii…or whatever your current generation of gaming system is) and allow you to watch Hulu on your TV through your gaming system. It will also stream YouTube, CBS, CNN, ESPN and your NetFlix view instantly video queue! Sound pretty cool right? Well, the program does cost, but there’s a free 14 day trial for you to check out to determine if this is your thing. Then, if you like it, just pay a small cost…less than the cost of a video game, and keep using it. That’s another good by the way, it’s one flat rate! It’s not subscription based like you might initially assume.

Now, some of the features are already made available through Xbox Live, such as the ability to watch your netflix view instantly queue. However many of the options are NOT available. So, it really is worth it. Definately something to check out at the very least.